Recommended Reading and Music
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Books on Sacred
Sexuality and Healing
Art of Sexual Ecstasy
Los Angeles: JP Tarcher, 1989
Art of Sexual Magic
Both available in paperback
The most comprehensive of the latest crop of tantra handbooks
and one of the few authored by a woman, this volume is
beautifully produced with numerous illustrations. Based
on a seminar series, it's packed with exercises for individuals
and couples. There is some integration of Eastern and Western
techniques, the instructions are clear and intermixed with
The section on Healing Your Genital Armoring is especially
San Francisco Downthere Press, 1993
Beautiful photographs celebrate the natural diversity of
Tao of Love and Sex
New York: EP Dutton, 1982
A great introduction to the Taoist approach to Sacred Sex.
The first in a series by the same author. The style is
gentle and evocative, the methods less detailed than some
of the other taoist writings.
Tao of Sexology
San Francisco: Tao Pub, 1986
Dr. Chang's instructions for sexual health and happiness,
drawn from traditional Taoist practice. Includes instructions
for both male and female "Deer Exercise" and
use of healing positions for intercourse. The simple Morning & Evening
Prayers suggested could change the world. Chang is the
author of numerous books on healing and nutrition and his
tone is sometimes dogmatic and pseudo-scientific, but the
material is quite intriguing.
Mantak Chia & Michael Winn
Secrets of Love: Cultivating Male Sexual Energy
New York: Aurora Press, 1984
This is the owner's manual to the male body you probably
didn't receive when you were born (but should have). Presents
some theory but mainly very detailed and systematic men's
practices for esoteric sex. Covers both solo and dual cultivation.
Also provides good anatomic and hygienic information. Mantak
Chia nicely blends Eastern and Western knowledge and presents
complex material in a straightforward, step-by-step manner.
His instructions for male ejaculatory control and "Valley
Orgasm" are excellent.
Mantak Chia and Dauglas Abrams Arava
San Francisco, Harper 1996
Chia's most recent book is a popularized version of Taoist
Secrets of Love. Easier reading but not as comprehensive
as the earlier book.
Mankak & Maneewan Chia
Love Through the Tao: Cultivating Female Sexual Energy
New York: Healing Tao Books, 1986
This is the woman's version of the owner's manual you wish
had been issued at birth. There is some overlap with the
book above, but the practices given are for women. Master
Chia and his wife Maneewan's instructions will allow you
to safely explore the outer limits of sexual experience,
alone or with a partner. Chia's books are more explicit
about the links between sexual and spiritual energies than
some of the other Taoist books and include details on several
forms of meditation.
Barbara Hand Clow
Light of Sex: Kundalini Rising at Mid-Life Crisis
Santa Fe, Bear & Company, 1996
This astrologically oriented treatment is an excellent
resource for those wishing more insight into kundalini
and opening the chakkras or energy centers of the body.
Nik Douglas and Penny Slinger
New York: Destiny Books, 1979
An encyclopedic book with wonderful illustrations, this
is a good source of historical background and theory of
Hindu and Buddhist tantric practice. Not the best how-to
manual, but it does provide inspiration. A fascinating
and unique section on Tantric Union of Three and the Taoist
Secret Dalliance make this volume a must.
Michael Reed Gach
for Lovers: Secrets of Touch for Increasing Intimacy
New York, Bantam, 1997
An excellent how-to manual for those who want to access
the energy meridians of the body as part of their lovemaking.
Clear and specific instructions with lots of diagrams and
Cybele and E. J. Gold
Hohm Press, 1978
This book was one of the first to get explicit about spiritual
sexual practice. It is harder to follow than some of the
more recent works, but excels in describing the consciousness "spaces" one
reaches through these practices. The Gold's call their
brand Objective Sex, and offer some unique preparatory
Lover Within: Opening to Energy in Sexual Practice
Barrytown, NY: Station Hill, 1986
Talman Co., 150 Fifth Ave., NY, NY 10011
A wonderful book, perfect for the uninitiated Westerner
who has no background in energetic or meditative disciplines.
Henderson is not technique oriented, rather she offers
lots of exercises for increasing energy awareness, both
alone and with partners. Her own personal experiences with
the exercises provide a friendly guide to their use.
Boundaries Betray Us:
Beyond Illusions of What Is Ethical in Therapy and Life
San Francisco, Harper, 1993
Rather than addressing the nature of sacred sex, this volume
helps redefine the role of the therapist or sexual healer
who doesn't shrink from traditional professional boundaries.
A bold and courageous effort to confront the issues of
ethics, love, truth and genuine intimacy.
Mill Valley: Mandala, 1994
A great introduction to tantric sex, full of practical
how to information.
Pleiadian Keys to the Living Library
Santa Fe, Bear & Company, 1995
The scope of this volume goes way beyond sacred sex, but
the excellent and inspiring material on sacred sexuality
is not to be missed. Unique and thought-provoking.
Charles and Caroline Muir
The Art of Conscious Loving
San Francisco: Mercury House, 1989
This lovely little manual with its endearing artwork is
sure to become a modern tantric classic. It's a good choice
for those who shrink from heavy reading. The Muirs' gentle,
humorous and healing approach includes tips for harmonious
relationships as well as specific tantric practices drawn
from their popular seminars.
of the Spirit
New York, Harmony Books, 1996
This modern classic focuses more on spirit than on sex
but is included here because it is an excellent guide to
understanding the seven chakras or energy centers of the
body. Myss integrates Hindu/tantric, Jewish Kabbalah, and
Christian Sacraments as well as providing tools for indentifying
blocks in and clearing the different centers.
David Ramsdale and Ellen Dorfman
Goleta, CA: Peak Skill, 1985
A beautiful introduction to the practice of higher consciousness
sexualove. This is an eclectic mix of tantric, Taoist and
Western knowledge. Straight forward, easily understandable,
and poetic, it is packed with information, but sometimes
lacking in detail.
Sunyata Saraswati and Bodhi Avinasha
Jewel in the Lotus
San Francisco: Kriya Jyoti, 1987
A systematic approach to tantric kriya yoga. Much emphasis
on yoga postures, mantras and breathing as preparation
for tantric sex. Concludes with instructions for the sacred
Enlightenment: Women in Tantric Buddhism
Princeton: Princeton Univ Press, 1994
Academic but fascinating account of the origins of tantra.
Guess what? Shaw argues that tantra was created by women
who sought to balance the increasingly cerebral, monastic,
patriarchal Buddhist religion with ancient Earth-based
Goddess worshipping practices.
New York: Henry Holt, 1998
Schnarch specializes in integrating sex therapy with marital
therapy. This volume translates the basic concepts of sacred
sexuality into completely Western language while challenging
the reader to summon the emotional maturity required for
Kenneth Ray Stubbs
of the Light: The New Sacred Prostitute
Larkspur California, Secret Garden, 1994
This highly readable collection of stories by women who
are embodying the archetype of the Sacred Prostitute in
a variety of modern ways created quite a stir in our community
when it came out several years ago. An inspiring and delightful
|Books on Love, Polyamory, & New Paradigm Relationships
Path to Love
New York, Harmony Books, 1997
Deepak does an excellent job of explaining the New Paradigm
for Love and the union of Sex and Spirit. A popular and
non-threatening approach which is totally aligned with
Love Without Limits.
Communion: Awakening Your Sexual Essence
Deerfield Beach, FL, Health Communications, 1995
A unique and interesting approach to making sense of male/female
relations. Definitely not for the politically correct crowd,
it presents a model for relationship that goes beyond equality.
Pleasure: Sex, Myth, and the Politics of the Body
San Francisco: Harper, 1995
If you read only one of these books, make it this one!
Eisler offers a compellingly complete analysis of how our
cultural attitudes toward love, sex, and family became
so destructive as well as some clear guidelines for finding
our way into a truly humane and sustainable future, where
pleasure rather than pain is the basis for relationship
with each other and with Earth. One key, says Eisler, is
the restructuring of the family and intimate relationships
between men and women. This volume offers a political and
philosophical basis for the polyamory and sacred sexuality
of Love: The Natural History of Monogamy, Adultery, & Divorce
New York: Norton, 1992
Fisher's basic premise is that life long sexual exclusivity
is unnatural for humans as well as virtually all other
animals. She speaks authoritatively, frequently citing
animal behavior studies and statistics for support, but
many of her conclusions are in fact highly speculative.
While Fisher has done an excellent job of unmasking the
typical behavior hiding beneath our cultural norms, her
apparent disregard for evidence of bonding beyond the dyad
is a serious flaw. Fisher's perspective on the evolution
of the family provides another interesting twist. She attributes
modern family values to the agricultural tradition and
views the current instability as a "return to our
nomadic roots." Divorce, secret affairs, single parents,
and blended families are nothing new, she asserts, and
have always been common. The only new development, she
insists, is single people living alone who choose a network
of friends they consider family.
Erotic Silence of the American Wife
New York: Signet, 1992
Brilliant, highly readable stories illustrating why women
stray from monogamy expose conventional marriage as a patriarchal,
misogynist institution. The message is that women's pleasure
and eroticism is valid and important. Heyn urges women
not to sell their sexuality out in order to fit the socially
prescribed criteria for "good girls" and "perfect
Our Strength: The Erotic as Power and the Love of God
San Francisco, Harper, 1989
This inspiring book on sexual justice by a lesbian Episcopal
priest and professor of theology is a rich source for a
sexual ethic that truly honors diversity. Heyward's touchstone
is the concept of mutual empowerment.
Sin: The Life and Death of the Oneida Community
New York, Viking, 1993
Most recent of many books on the famous Oneida community
which practiced both sacred sexuality and polyamory. Includes
an account of founder John Humphrey Noyes system of complex
Land, Sacred Sex: Rapture of the Deep
Durango, CO: Kivaki Press, 1992
Sacred Land, Sacred Sex combines impeccable scholarship
with a personal, readable style to create a straightforward
analysis of what's wrong with our culture, how it got that
way, and what to do about it. LaChapelle traces the beginnings
of the split between the human and the natural world to
the widespread influence of the abstract Greek language
which has no intrinsic meaning. (Just as mystic G.I. Gurdjieff
does, though he does not explain as clearly why this is
so.) Her understanding is based on over forty years of
sifting through information derived from every conceivable
academic discipline as well as direct observation of herself,
her skiing buddies, and of the nature itself. Then, by
sharing knowledge and stories collected from indigineous
cultures around the world, she gives us a picture of another
way to live along with specific suggestions for reviving
the old ways. The road home can be summed up in one word,
ritual. "Sacred ritual concerns putting all parts
of the human together deep inside the individual, for putting
humans together in society and for facilitating human interactions
with nature. Such sacred rituals not only keep alive the
old ways but also facilitate rapid change, effortlessly,
in a society."
LaChapelle's courage and creative genius
really shines through though in her ability to trace the
links between caring for the earth, a sense of place, natural
birth (population) control, spirituality, and human sexuality.
Unlike single issue ecologists, she recognizes that the
right use of our sexual energy is an important key to restoring
balance to the earth, and she is not afraid to take on
monogamy and the nuclear family as major contributors to
the current crisis. "We're all bleeding at the roots
because we're all suffering from treating sex as a substance.
In fact, the biggest substance abuse of all is monogamy
... No energy is fed back into the whole of either the
culture or the place. Of course, that's one of the reasons
for the monogamous ideal, it keeps the economy of the Industrial
Growth Society going very well."
Sacred Land, Sacred Sex is good medicine! "I
do not presume to tell you how to do it, I merely explain
how to set up structures so that nature herself, in your
own place, can once again begin to teach you. In this kind
of learning, there is no knowledge, in the usual sense,
to process and convey; there is instead a deepening of
attention to the pattern of all life around you so that
you begin to live your life according to that pattern.
I That Is We:
Awakening to Higher Energies Through Unconditional Love
Berkeley: Celestial Arts, 1985
A personal account of the transformation process by a medical
doctor who saw the light. Includes his experience in healing
life threatening disease in himself and others through "energy
work." Also has helpful sections on working with groups.
New York: Bantam, 1959
First published in 1929; a genuine classic by the Nobel
Laureate. An entertaining and exquisitely clear critique
Garden City: Doubleday, 1983
Marvelous, beautifully written theoretical work, placing
inclusive relationships in a psychological and spiritual
San Francisco: Booklegger Publishing, 1996
Celeste West has written a wise, witty, and charming manual
for all polyamorous people. Based on a survey of 500 lesbians,
the ring of authenticity comes through in the nitty gritty
details of the personal stories related here.
Neale Donald Walsch
Conversations with God Book
Charlottesville, VA, Hampton Roads, 1997
These popular works have really struck a chord with the
American public. Incredible as it may seem, God comes out
in favor of polyamory and sacred sexuality. Invaluable
if you're looking for support for questioning monogamy.
New York, Ballantine Books, 1993
Another book with a scope beyond sex and relationship,
included here because of the incredible validation it offers
for alternatives to monogamy from a best selling, popular
New York: Warner Books, 1976
Inspiring utopian fantasy about a society where jealousy
and possessiveness do not exist. An underground classic
despite the lack of literary finesse.
Marion Zimmer Bradley
New York: DAW Books, Inc., 1977
Low-tech science fiction tale about a race of telepaths
with sexual mores similar to, but slightly different from,
those of earthlings. Twin sisters and their new husbands
find themselves forming a powerful foursome which becomes
the core of a new culture. Bradley (best known for The
Mists of Avalon) has captured the essence of multipartner
lovemaking in this volume of the popular Darkover novels.
Ecotopia and Ecotopia
New York: Bantam, 1975
Two more underground classics, packed with information
about ALL aspects of life in a sustainable, ecological
utopia where people are not phobic about multiple intimate
New York: Pocket Books, 1984
Amusing and uplifting allegory on new paradigm love with
useful input on dealing with negative emotions, such as
guilt, fear, jealousy and dependency. Also provides encouragement
for challenging the status quo and realizing utopian dreams.
in a Strange Land
New York: Berkeley, 1961
Grandaddy of the underground classics; often credited with
beginning the modern alternative lifestyle movement. Recently
reissued in an unexpurgated edition. If you can overlook
what would now be considered sexist dialogue, you're left
with a grand vision of sexualoving religious communities.
Moon Is a Harsh Mistress
New York: Berkeley, 1968
Another Heinlein classic, which introduces the concept
of line marriage.
on the Edge of Time
New York: Fawcett Crest, 1976
Better written but more depressing than any of the above,
this feminist utopia has a lot in common with the more
patriarchal visions aboveói.e., nonexclusive relationships
and expanded family.
Marriages Between Zones Three, Four, and Five
New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 1980
Doris Lessing has been teaching us about relationships
and other important matters through her novels for several
decades. In this parable, the female ruler of a highly
evolved society where multiadult families are the norm
is sent to mate with the male ruler of a backward, violent
and repressive patriarchal kingdom.
Fifth Sacred Thing
New York: Bantam, 1993
A delightful tale of a self sufficient, spiritually and
ecologically responsible culture struggling to preserve
itself from the attacks of an evil empire. Imagine that
the best and highest elements of the neopagan movement
have become cultural norms and you'll have a glimpse of
Starhawk's vision. A vision with polylove, sacred sex,
and expanded family at its heart.
Temple of My Familiar
NY: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1989
Best selling novel by one of the most talented Americans
writing today. Most reviewers have neglected to mention
that the book's main characters engage in multimate relationships
which are for the most part portrayed in a positive light.
by David Frank
Ethereal, heart opening instrumental which we often play
during the puja. It conveys the feeling of returning to
the home of your soul.
by Patrick Bernhardt
A true classic, one of the best of this genre. Heart opening,
expansive music with unique chanting woven into the melody.
We often play this toward the end of a breath or sexual
healing session or during Tantra Polarity Circles.
This is shake it up music, composed to accompany Osho's
moving meditation. We often use it to open a workshop and
get into our bodies.
by Brent Lewis
World beat drumming, guaranteed to make your body move.
Often used for the "men's dance."
by Professor Trance
Great tribal dance music with jungle noises and far out
narration. Our most requested "get the energy moving" title.
Hadra: The Mystic Dance
Sufi inspired melody with a hypnotic "heart beat" drum.
Takes you very deep. We often use this to start the breath
by Steven Halpern & Suru
Not our friend Steven usual stress soothing massage music!
This is African drumming with hypnotic background melody.
Tribal dance music.
Ocean of Remembrance
by Aruj Guvenc & Timata
One of the best recordings of Sufi chanting or Zikr. Great
The Best of the Pointer Sisters
by the Pointer Sisters
Includes our favorite dance numbers, Jump for My Love,
I'm So Excited as well as our theme song, I Want a Lover
with a Slow Hand.
by Gabrielle Roth & the Mirrors
Initiation is a Gabrielle Roth classic and still our favorite,
taking you on a sensual, rhythmic journey. Can be used
for erotic dance but we usually play it during group massage.
Refuge is Gabrielle's latest release and is her version
of traditional Tibetan Buddhist chanting. Good for meditation.
Australian aboriginal music, for trance dancing or breathing.
Also good traveling music.
by Rusty Crutcher
Native American influenced instrumentals and some low chanting.
Earthy, mystical, and heart opening all at once. We sometimes
use this in the chaos puja or for group massage. Also by
Rusty Crutcher Lovedance Heart opening, jazz-based instrumentals.
Some of our favorite puja music.
by by Alain Eskinasi
Evocative, sensual instrumentals take you on a journey
through the chakras or energy centers in the body. We like
this one for the sexual healing sessions.
More heart opening, delicate, dreamy instrumentals. We
sometimes use this for the puja or worship circles. Also
good for lovemaking.
Unique Mayan flavored mystical, upbeat, music, some with
vocals. We use this for "spooning." If you like
Peruvian flutes you'll like this. Perfect for our Tulum,
Mexico Tantra Retreat Oct 10-17, 1998.
by Jai Uttal and the Pagan Love Orchestra
Jai Uttal combines Hindu devotional style vocals with a
world beat sound. Infectious! We often use this to set
the mood for Saturday night Celebration time. Also good
Sophia became well-known in tantric circles for the original
music she once composed and played for Charles Muir's workshops.
Her soaring, heart opening voice, inspiring lyrics, and
gentle instrumentals are perfect for setting a tantric
by Robert Gass and On Wings of Song
Our favorite Goddess music, includes Pagan, Christian,
and Hindu chants calling in the Goddess. Often used before
the workshop to set the mood.
also by by Robert Gass
Om Namaha Sivaya
The traditional Hindu chant, On Wings of Song style, honoring
Shiva, the Divine maleness.
Journey of the Drums
by Prem Das, Muruga, & Shakti
Shamanic drumming, jungle sounds, evocative, erotic, emotivie
human voices, often used during the breathwork.
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